


rise rise, the moon, the tide

by rinnosgen



Category: Killing Eve (TV 2018)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Headcanon, Hurt/Comfort, Religion, Sexual Content
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-02
Updated: 2020-09-02
Packaged: 2021-03-06 16:08:35
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 1
Words: 761
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26251687
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinnosgen/pseuds/rinnosgen
Summary: With her mouth and tongue, she offers her flaming love to Anna.
Relationships: Anna Leonova/Villanelle | Oksana Astankova
Comments: 6
Kudos: 17





	rise rise, the moon, the tide

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [rise rise, the moon, the tide](https://archiveofourown.org/works/26251456) by [rinnosgen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/rinnosgen/pseuds/rinnosgen). 



> 1\. It's my self-indulgent work and it may talk about sex a lot. I translated it myself so all errors are mine.
> 
> 2\. The age of consent in Russia is 16 so what happens between Anna and Oksana is set after that age.

Life is a prison.

Yet you enlighten me a way out.

* * *

i.

Oksana spends most of her time thinking about Anna, the rest of time studying. She reads all the books she borrows from Anna’s bookshelves, regardless of the genres. Oksana loves reading Anna’s annotations, her fingertips touching Anna’s handwriting, and inevitably going back to think of Anna.

The radio begins to play [Debussy’s Arabesque No. 1](https://youtu.be/qDQUEhS8t6k), one of Anna’s favourites. Oksana leaves the desk, lying on the mattress with her legs hanging off the bed, and unfastens her pants. An oil lamp is left burning on the table, the light of which gleams on her bare belly and her sweaty back of the hand.

ii.

Oksana knows Anna is a devout woman. She’d noticed that since the first day they met, when Oksana saw the cross shaped pendant on her bosom.

Oksana believes in neither God, nor the so-called Supreme Being in the world. What Oksana believes in is force. Power. That’s what papa taught her. Papa made her realized how to use her strength, how to defeat others, so Oksana put a pencil into a boy’s left eye, because Oksana wanted to conquer.

It’s so naïve of Anna to believe God exists, Oksana thinks, but she won’t share her thoughts with Anna, for the attitude of Anna kneeling down to pray is beautiful after all.

Some Sundays, when Maxi is gone, Oksana goes to church as company for Anna. Oksana doesn’t enter the abbey. She hates to hear people singing for a delusional existence, she hates to see people weeping for a false illusion even more. The only thing she does is wait outside, wandering in a azalea garden. Sometimes she climbs up the railings, sometimes she sits on the stone walls, sticking around until the end of Anna’s nonsense. Oksana watches clouds and straws. She feels like they have so many words for her; therefore Oksana listens.

Oksana can imagine what Anna has said to her almighty God. She’s probably asking for God’s forgiveness, to forgive her for the sex that happens between them again and again. Oksana cannot figure out why Anna describes their affair as unholy. With her mouth and tongue, she offers her flaming love to Anna; the unbearable restlessness drags her into constant suffering, adjacent blindness, and sporadic madness.

She cannot understand how remarkable and precious it is to be forgiven by God. If Anna is asking for solace to ease her mind, Oksana will give it to her. Oksana forgives Anna all the time, forgives Anna for desiring her but not willing to let Maxi go, forgives Anna for regarding her as a guilty secret, forgives Anna for not admitting what they do is in fact fairly satisfying.

Oksana has seen the paintings of believers in religious ecstasy when they are having an epiphany. What the paintings portray is entire pleasure. Oksana recognises that kind of expression. Whenever she lifts her eyes from Anna’s thighs, she has an artistic-like vision.

She thinks about Anna’s shutting eyes as she says her prayers, the praying hands in front of her chest, the hem of her skirt wrinkles with her posture, the neck cape covered by her dishevelled curls. Her stomach is roaring and pulling.

As soon as Anna walks out of the building, Oksana grabs her hand, leading her into a desolate forest. She shoves Anna onto a tree and kisses her. Anna is surprised at first but quickly she opens her mouth to accept Oksana’s hot tongue. Oksana kneels on a pile of leaves and raises Anna’s skirt. Anna tastes like church but Oksana doesn’t mind. She fulfills her duty to finish the things she’s always done for Anna.

After Anna comes in her mouth, Oksana immediately unbuttons her jeans and thrusts her hand down. It doesn’t take her too much time.

As she looks up, calling Anna by her name, Oksana swears she perceives a euphoric white light illustrated in the holy book.

iii.

Anna complains that her palms are too big to be a woman’s. Oksana finds Anna silly, and feels sad at the same time. Anna has a pair of such beautiful hands, hands of an artist, hands which leave colourful marks on Oksana’s body.

“It’s nothing like that,” Oksana takes Anna’s hands and kisses her palms.

“Your hands have given me so much comfort and so much love,” she pulls both of Anna’s hands to fully cover her naked and glowing breasts.

“And they fit perfectly here,” Oksana says. Her nipples are growing harder in Anna’s moist but warm hands.


End file.
